Maiden of the Mist

So my family decided to take a bus tour to Niagara Falls from Toronto, and by "bus tour" I mean 12 hour unnecessarily long tourist trap. Luckily the first stop along the way was a winery (timestamp 10:30 AM, aka 7:30 AM LA time). Today was definitely the earliest I've ever started drinking and ABSOLUTELY necessary. After 4 glasses of wine and 4 hours of random touristy bus stops we finally arrived in Niagara Falls. 

That morning I decided to wear my "Moby Dick goes fly-fishing with a dominatrix" boots to fit in with the Maid of the Mist boat theme. Although I would never willingly allow people to wear any sort of poncho in public that is not a costume, whether mexican novelty or 1998 Walmart couture, I found the blue plastic gem pictured above to be utilitarian chic. What you may not realize is that "mist" is an understatement. Niagara Falls is very beautiful and looks serene and majestic from afar, but up close it is far from "misty". I felt like I was in some kind of swirling hurricane deathtrap, holding on for dear life to the railing while simultaneously trying to look at the waterfall without losing a contact. For a second I thought it was 2005 in New Orleans and I was in the midst of a viscous battle with Hurricane Katrina. (Too soon?)

Overall, I highly recommend visiting Niagara falls, it is 100% worth the trip in all its touristy glory. My only advice? Waterproof mascara. 

Goodbye LA, Hello... Canada?

As you can see, I did manage to fit everything into my two suitcases, except for the boots and leather jacket which I had to wear in order to bring along. The best part of the outfit? Taking off the boots in security only to remember that I wore Santa Fe inspired chili pepper socks. I'm sure this was the only surprise that airport security would find laughable, other surprises being along the lines of weapons and bombs disguised as regular toiletries in 3 oz. bottles. (Apparently this happens.) Airports are getting so stingy these days that if the travel sized toothpaste bomber were to make it on the plane, we would still all be doomed because in order to receive a life jacket and breathing mask we would have to swipe our credit cards and pay a twenty five dollar fee. 

Luckily, I did not have to ponder this scenario for too long because as soon as we took our seats on the plane, my mom offered me a Xanax. I believe the true right of passage into adulthood these days is being offered prescription sedatives. I'll know that my mid life crisis will occur when I start asking for them. Anyways, I was so confused when we landed I thought I was still in America, I imagined toothless hockey players occupying this foreign country, rather than finding myself in what looked to be exactly where I started. 

Canadian style? So far I am pretty sure I'm still in America, but either way the chili pepper socks are a MUST.

Tetris anyone?

If you do not already know, I am about to embark on a 4 month "Semester at Sea" (aka CRUISE) around the world. And this is what I am packing. You may be thinking to yourself 'Stephanie you are insane, there is no way anyone needs that much stuff, let alone fit it into two suitcases.' First of all, you have to be a little crazy to do what I am about to do. Secondly, it's true no one needs all this stuff, but if I wasn't bringing it, this style blog would be awful. Thirdly, it will fit, it HAS to. 

Seeing as this is my first post, I feel as though I should give my readers a little disclaimer. This blog is about travel and PERSONAL style, so you may not agree with all of my posts. If I were to describe myself it would be some combination of Carrie Bradshaw, Chelsea Handler, Dr. Quinn Medicine Woman, and MacGruber. Also, I think I am hilarious, but at times I can border on inappropriate. Given the above information, feel free to read or not read the following posts, but I hope, at the end of all of this we all learn something, even if it is don't let Stephanie have a blog. 

Enjoy!